Friday, June 24, 2016

Ends of Things

Once upon a time I went through a "Black" phase. I’ve been told it was a bit dark, and admittedly, my outlook on life and myself was a bit bleak. But my writing certainly flourished during that time. Making me a very proud writer for the past 18 years.

However, sometimes it feels like I perpetually visit the black phase. There are days when I just sit around doing my thing wishing I could just lie down and die. Calm the alarms, I said die. Some people just want to die, some people just die, some people don’t die...die die die.

It’s always surprising to see the legacy of things. When a celebrity dies, certain worlds mourn a great loss, a great creative soul has gone. We pay so much importance to what people do, to how they behaved in public settings, and to the people they affected.

But maybe we pay attention too much? Maybe we’re too opinionated. Maybe we need to stop forcing our opinions on people. Perhaps we should all adopt the policy of informing people that we have an opinion and then if they consent to listening to it we lay it down. Like this blog, for example.

I will post on my social media that I’m writing about the ends of things. Then, my friends and family can see if they want to partake in reading the ends of things. You know the end of things aren’t so glamorous. Life is a bitch. Always being on top of the game is taxing.

Knowing when and what time and how fast the next move is coming is exhausting. Restructuring your eating, napping, walking, and sleeping schedule is just obsessive. But it’s what I need to do to not end things.

I’m an adult. I don’t escape feelings or responsibilities. I crawl through them when I have to. I find things bigger than me like my crafts for humanity project. I keep going until I can because the black phase doesn’t have full reign. There are no ends, just threads that join into the next adventure.

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